The Toxic Avenger1984

Christmas 1989 at Aunt Peggy’s house: A young James G. sits up straight on a dusty old plaid couch’s armrest, presumably to sit as far away from people as he can get. Years later, my mom will claim he stared at my sisters “in a creepy way.” She makes similar claims about different people often so I’m pretty sure that part is untrue.  Anyway, a young James turns to his cousin Sean - it’s a different Sean - and says, Hey broseph, have you seen The Toxic Avenger? Sean tries to bring up The Fly and The Thing, but no - James G. has more to say about some stupid fucking thing called the Tromaverse.   A young Murray Mintz sits in an equally distant corner in Peggy’s living room that same 1989 Christmas Day - his memory is fuzzy, but he recalls the old plaid couch 34 years later. He also realizes he witnessed the birth of the Cosmic MCU on that cold Christmas morning just 34 years ago - the year Taylor Swift is born, praise be. I could’ve stopped the MCU Phases 3 and Up, but I failed.  And now they’re now rebooting the shitty and problematic film- The Toxic Avenger.  It’s oozing sleaze, and you can’t help but imagine a young James G. discovering the foundation for what will become the Cosmic MCU while watching gym rats run over a child’s head.  This movie is offensive and tasteless, but there’s something about Lloyd Kaufman’s sleaze that makes it all seem ok.  But seriously, Lloyd Kaufman is the only reason I’m giving this 3 stars