Two funeral parlours fight one another for business, one of whom is more shady than the other.
| Actor | Role |
|---|---|
 Bill FraserBasil Bulstrode | Basil Bulstrode |
 Raymond HuntleyEmmanuel Holroyd | Emmanuel Holroyd |
 David BattleyPercy | Percy |
 Dennis PriceEugene Soul | Eugene Soul |
 Richard WattisSimmonds | Simmonds |
 Roy KinnearPurvis | Purvis |
 John RonaneRoland Smallbody | Roland Smallbody |
 Sue LloydMiss Peach | Miss Peach |
 Michael RipperArthur (Railway Porter) | Arthur (Railway Porter) |
 Dudley FosterGrimthorpe | Grimthorpe |
 Bob ToddFuneral Director | Funeral Director |
 Hugh PaddickWindow Dresser | Window Dresser |
 Eric BarkerPusher | Pusher |
| KKen ParryRailway Porter | Railway Porter |
 Clifford MollisonWitherspoon | Witherspoon |
 Frank ThorntonTown Clerk | Town Clerk |
 Geoffrey SumnerLord Lieutenant | Lord Lieutenant |
| JJohn SharpMayor | Mayor |
 Peter Copley1st Funeral Director | 1st Funeral Director |
 Michael Robbins2nd Funeral Director | 2nd Funeral Director |
| GGeorge HoweParson | Parson |
| AAnthony SagarPoliceman | Policeman |
 Carole CatkinModel in window | Model in window |