SLC Punk1998

I’ve been having a slow burning mental breakdown build up over the last 29 years of my life. Tomorrow is my birthday by the way. I feel like such a waste of space. I feel like I’m wrong. Like something went wrong in the process. I feel so disconnected from the entire world. And I feel like a bitch for saying anything.  I got really fucking wasted the other night when I watched die another day. And I felt like shit the whole next day. I still feel like shit. I’m scared about tomorrow. But I’m more scared about right now. I live in fear of the present. Because I don’t think it can change. I can’t see my life getting better. I just think it’s going to be this forever. Or at least for the next 10-20 years.  I’ve lost the most important time of my life. What’s left? I am so stagnant. I can’t do anything. I can’t move I can’t think. I just sit. Let it pass over me. Let it pass me by. I’m so scared.  Whatever.