After England's football (soccer) manager has a heart attack, Mike Bassett is hired as the new manager and promptly announces the team will win the World Cup.
| Actor | Role |
|---|---|
 Ricky TomlinsonMike Bassett | Mike Bassett |
 Amanda RedmanKarine Bassett | Karine Bassett |
 Philip JacksonLonnie Urquart | Lonnie Urquart |
 Bradley WalshDave Dodds | Dave Dodds |
 Martin BashirInterviewer | Interviewer |
 Phill JupitusTommo Thompson | Tommo Thompson |
 Dean Lennox KellyKevin Tonkinson | Kevin Tonkinson |
 Robbie GeeSmallsy | Smallsy |
 Geoff BellGary Wackett | Gary Wackett |
 PeléSelf | Self |
 Ulrich ThomsenDr. Hans Shoegaarten | Dr. Hans Shoegaarten |
 Geoffrey HutchingsGeoffrey Lightfoot | Geoffrey Lightfoot |
 Angela CurranMargaret | Margaret |
| DDanny TennantJason Bassett | Jason Bassett |
 Sean GilderJournalist | Journalist |
| MMark BurdisJournalist | Journalist |
 Nigel LindsayJournalist | Journalist |
| SSue BarkerSelf | Self |
 Gabby LoganSelf | Self |
 Keith AllenSelf | Self |
| NNatasha KaplinskySelf | Self |
| DDickie BirdSelf | Self |
 Robert PuttJack Marshall | Jack Marshall |
 John AlfordDeano | Deano |
| DDean HolnessDanny | Danny |
| SScott MeanParksey | Parksey |
| TTerry KielyHarpsey | Harpsey |
| PPeter McGillycuddyGorgeous | Gorgeous |
| TToby RedwoodBerksey | Berksey |
| TThomas KenyonMacca | Macca |