 Charlie SheenTopper Harley | Topper Harley |
 Lloyd BridgesPresident Thomas 'Tug' Benson | President Thomas 'Tug' Benson |
 Valeria GolinoRamada Rodham Hayman | Ramada Rodham Hayman |
 Richard CrennaCol. Denton Walters | Col. Denton Walters |
 Rowan AtkinsonDexter Hayman | Dexter Hayman |
 Miguel FerrerCommander Arvid Harbinger | Commander Arvid Harbinger |
 Brenda BakkeMichelle Rodham Huddleston | Michelle Rodham Huddleston |
 Jerry HalevaSaddam Hussein | Saddam Hussein |
 David WohlGerou | Gerou |
 Mitchell RyanGray Edwards | Gray Edwards |
 Michael ColyarWilliams | Williams |
 Ryan StilesRabinowitz | Rabinowitz |
| RRosemary JohnstonLavinia Rodham Benson | Lavinia Rodham Benson |
| BBen LemonTeam 2 Leader | Team 2 Leader |
 Buck McDancerRichard Nixon | Richard Nixon |
| LLarry LindseyGerald Ford | Gerald Ford |
| EEd BehelerJimmy Carter | Jimmy Carter |
| DDaniel T. HealyGeorge Bush | George Bush |
 Jay KochRonald Reagan | Ronald Reagan |
 Charles HaugkNavy Seal | Navy Seal |
| DDian KobayashiMrs. Rodham Soto | Mrs. Rodham Soto |
 Bob VilaSelf | Self |
 Stuart Proud Eagle GrantGeronimo | Geronimo |
| JJ. D. DeKranisMichael Corleone Lookalike | Michael Corleone Lookalike |
| BBob LegionaireCaptain McCluskey Lookalike | Captain McCluskey Lookalike |
| CCorey RandSollozzo Lookalike | Sollozzo Lookalike |
 Tony EdwardsLimo Driver | Limo Driver |
 James LewKick Boxer Opponent | Kick Boxer Opponent |
 Gerald OkamuraCorrupt Kick Boxing Referee | Corrupt Kick Boxing Referee |
 Chi Muoi LoThai Kick Boxing Sportscaster | Thai Kick Boxing Sportscaster |
