Celeste and Bam Bam escape their Midwest hometown for New York, and take on their high-school nemeses - the dictators of the world-famous Salon Mirage - while discovering that true beauty lies within.
| Actor | Role |
|---|---|
 Jane LynchDarlene | Darlene |
 John ChoStephan | Stephan |
| BBruce DanielsBam Bam | Bam Bam |
 Elaine HendrixJackie | Jackie |
 Kathy NajimyLegba | Legba |
 Alan CummingEugene | Eugene |
 Margaret ChoCeleste / Mommy | Celeste / Mommy |
 Butch KleinRyan | Ryan |
 Wayne FedermanRedneck | Redneck |
 Katy SelverstoneAllegra | Allegra |
| SSabrina MatthewsSuburban Dyke | Suburban Dyke |
 Kali RochaAngela | Angela |
 Jackie KashianEileen | Eileen |
 Nisha GanatraLinda | Linda |
| MMichael J. McKennaGiant | Giant |
| RRyan LandryClem | Clem |
| DDanny HochNeo Nazi | Neo Nazi |
 Wilson CruzTony | Tony |
| CChris WilliamsMalik | Malik |
 Jackie BeatShandra | Shandra |
| MMolly BryantWaitress | Waitress |
 Mark VasconcellosStage Manager | Stage Manager |
| AAaron Jennings HartnellTrading Faces Cameraman (uncredited) | Trading Faces Cameraman (uncredited) |
| AAshley HinsonRoxanne (uncredited) | Roxanne (uncredited) |
| JJason OliveGraham (uncredited) | Graham (uncredited) |
| KKyra OserSalon Girl (uncredited) | Salon Girl (uncredited) |